Author Topic: A Negative Experience  (Read 9916 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« on: March 28, 2006, 05:12:00 AM »
I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.

After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.

The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.

Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.

When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.

In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.

But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.

What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.

After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.

It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.

To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.

Frederick W. Burnside
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #1 on: March 28, 2006, 05:37:00 AM »
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #2 on: March 28, 2006, 07:26:00 AM »
Whew..I remember that school meeting in '74.  That was pretty intense.  As far as the Mansion fire, it was in the summer of '75 and it was set by a couple of kids that thought if they burned the school down, summer school would be cancelled.  I don't think they had time enough "to feel the pressure"....when you make comments like that you really are sending a false message to people who read this with little Hyde background.  Your angst after 30 years still seems to be playing a role in your life, I hope you're seeking professional help!
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Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #3 on: March 28, 2006, 07:29:00 AM »
PS Freddy...if you're going to attach a name to such comments...put your real name there!
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Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #4 on: March 28, 2006, 07:47:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.



After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.



The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.



Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.



When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.



In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.



But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.



What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.



After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.



It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.



To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.



Frederick W. Burnside

"


Fred,

 "Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting"

If Joe was well adjusted there would be no hyde.  Normal people don't think they need to change the world.  I am not excusing him as I was the butt of at least one of his irrational rants.  I have a couple of Van Gogh prints.  I like his art. I would not have him over for dinner though, if you follow what I am driving at.

"The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted"

That term was not used in the 70's

"we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way"

I wish I had studied sociology, but I am an engineer.  I think it works like this:

you create a seperate community

you give the community an identity that have an opposition to the outside world with a mission to help the outside world.  

If that in and of it self is bad then the apostle Paul was evil.

"In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries. "

It was 1975 during summer school so if you were a student in 74 you were not there. The Student union was built prior to that (in 73 or 74 ?) so meals were not served in the mansion at that time.  

"But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member "

Hyde as a community is prone to suffer from the human condition.  On a more macro level what you are calling attention to not unlike the Stalin purges, McCarthyism or more to the point the Cultural revolution which I believe this incident was hydes own cultural purge of "old school to new school"  Ed was a craft operator.

Could say more but I got to get back to work.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #5 on: March 28, 2006, 08:15:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.



After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.



The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.



Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.



When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.



In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.



But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.



What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.



After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.



It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.



To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.



Frederick W. Burnside

"


I'm really glad you've added your historical perspective.  Our family has only been involved with Hyde for a couple of years.  Unfortunately we didn't have the benefit of opinions like yours when we looked at schools.  We made a terrible mistake when we enrolled our kid at Hyde.  We were sold a bill of goods and didn't really understand all of the harm being inflicted by Hyde until late in the fall.  By then it was too late.  We've limped through the experience gritting our teeth.  Fortunately we've met a bunch of other parents who feel the same way we do and who are just trying to cope until they're out of the Gauld grasp (and trying to fend off the Hyde groupies).

What's so sad is that your words about what Hyde was like 30 years ago could be written today.  It sounds like so little has changed, except for the fact that these internet discussions are letting tons of parents know to stay away from Hyde.  Before this, Hyde got away with secrecy and very slow word of mouth.

Reading your comments convinces me that Hyde is very entrenched and isn't likely to respond to criticism.  It's like a cult that refuses to believe that the outside world makes any sense.  The only thing Hyde will respond to is a drop in applications and enrollments.  Our family has been called by a bunch of people who know of our connection with the school and who've asked about sending their kid there.  We don't hesitate to say, absolutely not, do NOT send your kid to Hyde.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #6 on: March 28, 2006, 10:00:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 05:15:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote

On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:


"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.





After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.





The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.





Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.





When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.





In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.





But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.





What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.





After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.





It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.





To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.





Frederick W. Burnside


"




I'm really glad you've added your historical perspective.  Our family has only been involved with Hyde for a couple of years.  Unfortunately we didn't have the benefit of opinions like yours when we looked at schools.  We made a terrible mistake when we enrolled our kid at Hyde.  We were sold a bill of goods and didn't really understand all of the harm being inflicted by Hyde until late in the fall.  By then it was too late.  We've limped through the experience gritting our teeth.  Fortunately we've met a bunch of other parents who feel the same way we do and who are just trying to cope until they're out of the Gauld grasp (and trying to fend off the Hyde groupies).



What's so sad is that your words about what Hyde was like 30 years ago could be written today.  It sounds like so little has changed, except for the fact that these internet discussions are letting tons of parents know to stay away from Hyde.  Before this, Hyde got away with secrecy and very slow word of mouth.



Reading your comments convinces me that Hyde is very entrenched and isn't likely to respond to criticism.  It's like a cult that refuses to believe that the outside world makes any sense.  The only thing Hyde will respond to is a drop in applications and enrollments.  Our family has been called by a bunch of people who know of our connection with the school and who've asked about sending their kid there.  We don't hesitate to say, absolutely not, do NOT send your kid to Hyde.  "


 I really doubt you have "bunches" of people calling you about Hyde and you have created a little sub rosa Hyde parents resistance movement. Freds post is full of factual mistakes so I doubt he (she or it) was there over the span he claims.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #7 on: March 28, 2006, 11:12:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 04:29:00, Anonymous wrote:

"PS Freddy...if you're going to attach a name to such comments...put your real name there!"


 I support the use of pseudonyms on this board.

Sumner Hawley
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« Reply #8 on: March 28, 2006, 11:26:00 AM »
Point taken and apologies: I made a mistake on the date of the fire. However, I do believe it was a reaction to the environment.

FWB
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A Negative Experience
« Reply #9 on: March 28, 2006, 11:53:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 08:26:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Point taken and apologies: I made a mistake on the date of the fire. However, I do believe it was a reaction to the environment.



FWB"


 Mmm no.

 It was the only fire that was set there, so I would say individual choice vs enviroment driven.  If your point were taken then no one should send kids to colubine.
 Many of the things that are pointed out as faults of Hyde are problems that are endemic to the human condition.  Every so often you draw an arsonist from the deck.  
People that drive change are egotists for the most part. Ever rose has it's thorns. Every silver lining has a touch of grey. Joe chews tennis balls.

Sue Doenym
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Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #10 on: March 28, 2006, 12:35:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 07:00:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote

On 2006-03-28 05:15:00, Anonymous wrote:


"
Quote


On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:



"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.







After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.







The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.







Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.







When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.







In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.







But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.







What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.







After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.







It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.







To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.







Frederick W. Burnside



"







I'm really glad you've added your historical perspective.  Our family has only been involved with Hyde for a couple of years.  Unfortunately we didn't have the benefit of opinions like yours when we looked at schools.  We made a terrible mistake when we enrolled our kid at Hyde.  We were sold a bill of goods and didn't really understand all of the harm being inflicted by Hyde until late in the fall.  By then it was too late.  We've limped through the experience gritting our teeth.  Fortunately we've met a bunch of other parents who feel the same way we do and who are just trying to cope until they're out of the Gauld grasp (and trying to fend off the Hyde groupies).





What's so sad is that your words about what Hyde was like 30 years ago could be written today.  It sounds like so little has changed, except for the fact that these internet discussions are letting tons of parents know to stay away from Hyde.  Before this, Hyde got away with secrecy and very slow word of mouth.





Reading your comments convinces me that Hyde is very entrenched and isn't likely to respond to criticism.  It's like a cult that refuses to believe that the outside world makes any sense.  The only thing Hyde will respond to is a drop in applications and enrollments.  Our family has been called by a bunch of people who know of our connection with the school and who've asked about sending their kid there.  We don't hesitate to say, absolutely not, do NOT send your kid to Hyde.  "




 I really doubt you have "bunches" of people calling you about Hyde and you have created a little sub rosa Hyde parents resistance movement. Freds post is full of factual mistakes so I doubt he (she or it) was there over the span he claims."


Au contraire. A very conservative estimate is that we've been contacted by at least 15 people who want to know what we think of Hyde and are eager to hear about our experience thus far.  It's probably closer to 20, but I'll only claim 15 to be on the safe side.  According to my dictionary, that qualifies as a "bunch."  In each instance we've provided very detailed summaries of our concerns and encouraged these people to find another school rather than send their child to Hyde.  Of course, these folks are free to reject our advice and look for other sources of info about Hyde.  Most of these folks have already talked to others about Hyde and report that our negative comments pretty much confirm what they've heard elsewhere.  Some report that they've talked to people who like Hyde, but most don't.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #11 on: March 28, 2006, 01:01:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 09:35:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote

On 2006-03-28 07:00:00, Anonymous wrote:


"
Quote


On 2006-03-28 05:15:00, Anonymous wrote:



"
Quote



On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:




"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.









After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.









The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.









Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.









When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.









In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.









But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.









What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.









After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.









It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.









To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.









Frederick W. Burnside




"










I'm really glad you've added your historical perspective.  Our family has only been involved with Hyde for a couple of years.  Unfortunately we didn't have the benefit of opinions like yours when we looked at schools.  We made a terrible mistake when we enrolled our kid at Hyde.  We were sold a bill of goods and didn't really understand all of the harm being inflicted by Hyde until late in the fall.  By then it was too late.  We've limped through the experience gritting our teeth.  Fortunately we've met a bunch of other parents who feel the same way we do and who are just trying to cope until they're out of the Gauld grasp (and trying to fend off the Hyde groupies).







What's so sad is that your words about what Hyde was like 30 years ago could be written today.  It sounds like so little has changed, except for the fact that these internet discussions are letting tons of parents know to stay away from Hyde.  Before this, Hyde got away with secrecy and very slow word of mouth.







Reading your comments convinces me that Hyde is very entrenched and isn't likely to respond to criticism.  It's like a cult that refuses to believe that the outside world makes any sense.  The only thing Hyde will respond to is a drop in applications and enrollments.  Our family has been called by a bunch of people who know of our connection with the school and who've asked about sending their kid there.  We don't hesitate to say, absolutely not, do NOT send your kid to Hyde.  "







 I really doubt you have "bunches" of people calling you about Hyde and you have created a little sub rosa Hyde parents resistance movement. Freds post is full of factual mistakes so I doubt he (she or it) was there over the span he claims."




Au contraire. A very conservative estimate is that we've been contacted by at least 15 people who want to know what we think of Hyde and are eager to hear about our experience thus far.  It's probably closer to 20, but I'll only claim 15 to be on the safe side.  According to my dictionary, that qualifies as a "bunch."  In each instance we've provided very detailed summaries of our concerns and encouraged these people to find another school rather than send their child to Hyde.  Of course, these folks are free to reject our advice and look for other sources of info about Hyde.  Most of these folks have already talked to others about Hyde and report that our negative comments pretty much confirm what they've heard elsewhere.  Some report that they've talked to people who like Hyde, but most don't."


How did they get your number? Are you advertising? do you have a famously disfunctional child? Can I have your number?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #12 on: March 28, 2006, 01:15:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 10:01:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote

On 2006-03-28 09:35:00, Anonymous wrote:


"
Quote


On 2006-03-28 07:00:00, Anonymous wrote:



"
Quote



On 2006-03-28 05:15:00, Anonymous wrote:




"
Quote




On 2006-03-28 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:





"I also went to Hyde School 30 years ago and am somewhat amazed to come across this forum. I can?t think of a more disingenuous and destructive place for an adolescent. While the basic premises of character building and tough love seem worthy, and may even work for some who went to Hyde,  the overall environment that was created was unhealthy, not to say bizarre.











After 1972 the school became increasingly strident and hysterical. Joe Gauld threw the most outrageous tantrums, shrieking and ranting accompanied by a Hitleresque  waving of arms, which in any sane place would have been viewed as unacceptable and aberrant. At Hyde these were perceived as justified and that the recipient must have provoked them by a lack of willingness to accept some deep truth about themselves. I have since learned such behavior is always a cheap, manipulative power play.











The over-emotionalism at Hyde was particularly unhealthy. Manufactured crises, whether of individuals or over the school?s direction, was always accompanied by wailing and crying as people confessed their supposed shortcomings and confronted others. There was an incredible lack of privacy, with every aspect of a student?s life scrutinized by both faculty and peers. The term ?brother?s keeper? was twisted to mean betrayal and students were acclaimed for confronting and making public others? ?negative attitudes,? which really meant maintaining a capacity for independent and critical thinking.











Seminars, now evidently called discovery groups, started out as helpful and supportive, but evolved into a hysterical feeding frenzy as students were confronted over anything from poor athletic performances, which necessarily demonstrated a lack of commitment to themselves, or an inability to ?give? and open up their true feelings. After 1972, these frequently degenerated into screaming and wailing sessions.











When you are involved in this environment on a daily basis, one?s own sense of reality becomes perverted. Because we were basically isolated on campus with parents coerced into supporting the Hyde Way, hysteria and tantrums became normal, even commendable. There was an illusion created that had no basis in reality. This reality was to be perpetuated by students who were willing to make a lifetime commitment to Hyde. Some of these are evidently still there today.











In 1976, one student who couldn?t handle the pressure tried to burn down the Mansion in the middle of the night. As this was the main building at the time, which served as a dormitory, dining area and housed all classrooms, it was a highly dangerous act. While there was considerable damage, there were no injuries.











But perhaps the sickest incident I witnessed occurred in the winter of 1974 and involved the confrontation of a faculty member who will remain nameless. This teacher was a definite Poindexter type, socially challenged but a perfectly decent individual. Evidently he proved unable or unwilling to truly ?give? of himself in the faculty seminar (discovery group). Early one afternoon, then headmaster Ed Legg announced an emergency school meeting and this teacher was hauled in front of students, faculty and staff and confronted.











What followed was a scene right out of Lord of the Flies. Ed Legg set the tone, offering up a damning appraisal of the teacher?s character and deep-seated problem connecting with the school. He then opened the floor to other students and faculty and  240 people set upon the teacher, screaming and crying for two hours, confronting him with how he was not only betraying himself, but the entire school. ?I can?t feel anything you?re saying,? screamed one student. ?I?m so disappointed in you, how could you let us down like this,? sobbed another.











After this incredible emotional purging he was given an opportunity to ?give? something of himself. Obviously in a state of considerable distress, he admitted to an affair he had during the Vietnam War with his best friend?s wife. ?And the damn woman seduced me,? he admitted, choking back tears. This was deemed by faculty and students to be insufficiently giving  and the teacher was judged to not truly be in touch with his feelings. Joe Gauld then closed the meeting saying, ?But the person I feel most bad for is your son.? The teacher had a two-month old baby.











It was all very hysterical, tawdry and pathetic. I remember being shocked and frightened at the time by the emotional intensity of it all. It was a manipulated mob run amuck. As with all of Hyde, the experience had no positive educational value. The only lesson learned was that frightened people in a group feed off each other, and are to be avoided.











To those who feel that people critical of Hyde need to toughen up, my response is there is a difference between toughness and manipulated hysteria and false truth. I had a great deal of unlearning to do as a consequence of my experience at Hyde, which took a number of years. After time past, my parents felt deeply guilty about sending me there. The fact that the same philosophy still exists at the school, and some of the same people, or their offspring, remain in charge is disturbing.  To those considering Hyde as an educational alternative, take note of some of the more sober posts in this forum and consider other alternatives.











Frederick W. Burnside





"













I'm really glad you've added your historical perspective.  Our family has only been involved with Hyde for a couple of years.  Unfortunately we didn't have the benefit of opinions like yours when we looked at schools.  We made a terrible mistake when we enrolled our kid at Hyde.  We were sold a bill of goods and didn't really understand all of the harm being inflicted by Hyde until late in the fall.  By then it was too late.  We've limped through the experience gritting our teeth.  Fortunately we've met a bunch of other parents who feel the same way we do and who are just trying to cope until they're out of the Gauld grasp (and trying to fend off the Hyde groupies).









What's so sad is that your words about what Hyde was like 30 years ago could be written today.  It sounds like so little has changed, except for the fact that these internet discussions are letting tons of parents know to stay away from Hyde.  Before this, Hyde got away with secrecy and very slow word of mouth.









Reading your comments convinces me that Hyde is very entrenched and isn't likely to respond to criticism.  It's like a cult that refuses to believe that the outside world makes any sense.  The only thing Hyde will respond to is a drop in applications and enrollments.  Our family has been called by a bunch of people who know of our connection with the school and who've asked about sending their kid there.  We don't hesitate to say, absolutely not, do NOT send your kid to Hyde.  "










 I really doubt you have "bunches" of people calling you about Hyde and you have created a little sub rosa Hyde parents resistance movement. Freds post is full of factual mistakes so I doubt he (she or it) was there over the span he claims."







Au contraire. A very conservative estimate is that we've been contacted by at least 15 people who want to know what we think of Hyde and are eager to hear about our experience thus far.  It's probably closer to 20, but I'll only claim 15 to be on the safe side.  According to my dictionary, that qualifies as a "bunch."  In each instance we've provided very detailed summaries of our concerns and encouraged these people to find another school rather than send their child to Hyde.  Of course, these folks are free to reject our advice and look for other sources of info about Hyde.  Most of these folks have already talked to others about Hyde and report that our negative comments pretty much confirm what they've heard elsewhere.  Some report that they've talked to people who like Hyde, but most don't."




How did they get your number? Are you advertising? do you have a famously disfunctional child? Can I have your number?"


Nope, no advertising.  We're active in a group of parents whose kids are struggling and/or face developmental challenges.  Many of the kids are teens.  Word spreads fast when parents enroll their child in a program; parents really value other parents' opinions.  This is all word of mouth.  We've received phone calls and email messages from people all over the U.S.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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A Negative Experience
« Reply #13 on: March 28, 2006, 02:27:00 PM »
So why did you leave your son at hyde for two years if it so bad?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #14 on: March 28, 2006, 08:28:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-03-28 11:27:00, Anonymous wrote:

"So why did you leave your son at hyde for two years if it so bad?"


Once all of us realized how bad Hyde is we were well into the academic year.  We told our kid that we were prepared to lose the money we paid Hyde and switch to another school.  Our child decided that another transition in the middle of the year didn't make sense; she decided to stick it out, which we really admired.  We spent the rest of the year looking for another school.  Our kid is now doing SO much better in a school that puts Hyde to shame.  Hyde was a terrible environment for all of us.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »