first timer

[Anonymous]

I've been invited to attend my first family weekend, I will go in a few months. What should I expect?  I've been told I need to learn a song and be prepared to sing in front of people, that I may do a ropes course and that I should read this book on the principles of the school.

I am a little confused about what we will be doing for those days. I am hoping it will just be a gettting to know you thing with some fun activities like those we had when I was in school at another boarding school in New England, but from what I am reading I am beginning to see shades of Harvey Jackins in all of this.  Yikes.  I want to support my family, but I don't know if this sounds helpful or harmful.

[Lars]

Wow, the place really hasn't changed much since I went there.  I won't tell you not to go if you really feel you need to support your family, but I can assure you it's not a getting to know each other thing with fun activities.  I call Hyde the "no fun zone."  Read the threads on this board very carefully.  There was nothing I hated more than family weekends when I there. :scared:

Expect to get sucked into the drama.  My advice (besides avoiding the place)?  Stand your ground.  Don't let any obnoxious, know it all jerks push you around.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-06 21:28:00, Lars wrote:

"Wow, the place really hasn't changed much since I went there.  I won't tell you not to go if you really feel you need to support your family, but I can assure you it's not a getting to know each other thing with fun activities.  I call Hyde the "no fun zone."  Read the threads on this board very carefully.  There was nothing I hated more than family weekends when I there. :scared:



Expect to get sucked into the drama.  My advice (besides avoiding the place)?  Stand your ground.  Don't let any obnoxious, know it all jerks push you around."

Saw this board for the first time. I would just like to echo Larry's sentiments.  I was one of those parents who was sucked into the drama of the moment, which thankfully I transended as the months went by and realized the hypocrisy and dishonesty that permeated the entire hierarchy of Hyde School.

The Ed's of the world can B.S. all they want, but the truth is Hyde is nothing but a Cult and unfortunately a dumping ground for children whose parents are desperate to find an answer for their various problems.

And for Ed's reference or anyone else my name is Steve Feig.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-06 22:19:00, Anonymous wrote:

"

On 2005-12-06 21:28:00, Lars wrote:


"Wow, the place really hasn't changed much since I went there.  I won't tell you not to go if you really feel you need to support your family, but I can assure you it's not a getting to know each other thing with fun activities.  I call Hyde the "no fun zone."  Read the threads on this board very carefully.  There was nothing I hated more than family weekends when I there. :scared:





Expect to get sucked into the drama.  My advice (besides avoiding the place)?  Stand your ground.  Don't let any obnoxious, know it all jerks push you around."

Saw this board for the first time. I would just like to echo Larry's sentiments.  I was one of those parents who was sucked into the drama of the moment, which thankfully I transended as the months went by and realized the hypocrisy and dishonesty that permeated the entire hierarchy of Hyde School.



The Ed's of the world can B.S. all they want, but the truth is Hyde is nothing but a Cult and unfortunately a dumping ground for children whose parents are desperate to find an answer for their various problems.



And for Ed's reference or anyone else my name is Steve Feig."

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-06 21:14:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I've been invited to attend my first family weekend, I will go in a few months. What should I expect?  I've been told I need to learn a song and be prepared to sing in front of people, that I may do a ropes course and that I should read this book on the principles of the school.



I am a little confused about what we will be doing for those days. I am hoping it will just be a gettting to know you thing with some fun activities like those we had when I was in school at another boarding school in New England, but from what I am reading I am beginning to see shades of Harvey Jackins in all of this.  Yikes.  I want to support my family, but I don't know if this sounds helpful or harmful."

Be prepared for a lot more than fun and games.  During the seminars you will be expected to disclose personal, intimate details of your family's life and you will be expected to comment on other group members' disclosures.  Some people are likely to be confronted.  Don't be surprised if someone in the group freaks out, yells, bolts from the room, breaks down crying, confronts a family member (parent or child).  This stuff happens, although it's not inevitable.  Also keep in mind that the people facilitating the group (staff and volunteer alumni parents) are not likely to have ANY professional training to help guide them in these situations.  You may seem some terribly inept efforts to deal with the emotional trauma that emerges.

And, in our family's experience the family weekend discussions tend to be fairly mild compared with the FLC you'll attend.  I know it's hard, but it's important to try to maintain your integrity and not cave in to peer pressure.  I've seen some horribly damaging things happen during these seminars.  This is one of the most unprofessional components of the Hyde model.  This is one of many reasons parents decide to leave Hyde.  Joe Gauld and others seem to believe this is sound practice; the rest of us know how negligent this is and how distorted Hyde staff's thinking is.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Lars, Dont ever leave this board, your informative, smart, and brutally honest..We need people like you to help the Hyde inquisitive and potential Hyde students..Great work for sure! :smile: