Will someone who went to Hyde please contact me right away

[Anonymous]

Theresa...your posts read like a combination of sales brochures for Hyde and the typical manipulative style of a program graduate (I graduated from a similar program from a similar time).  People here have expressed their personal concerns and you either questioned their validity (i.e. parents asking about the exercises) by stating that the parents must have been out of line in some way or another. Other than that...your responses are so canned that if I were one of these parents trying to converse with you I would begin to wonder if Hyde has created/hired some sort of "Bot"/person to answer questions on it's behalf here on Fornits.

You say that you only came across this site while looking for a logo for T-shirts.  Did you really expect to find one here? Does Hyde not have one on their website?

I have got a great idea...if you want to prove what you say...you have read numerous concerns and complaints from people on this board...yet the only response that you throw into the pot is that they were somehow wrong/came off the wrong way...or you will help them draft a letter.

well...start drafting...post it here for all of us to see...apparently if anybody complains they are saying the wrong thing or saying it at the wrong time...well...show us how it is done...show us a complaint letter that addresses the issues that people have problems with and that actually changes things at Hyde.

You are not offering much of a solution to the problems that these parents have experienced...therefore...you must be part of the problem.

[Anonymous]

If it's such a bad place than why are so many teachers former students?

[Anonymous]

It says a lot about your character that you played along for three years and had the gall to accept a diploma.  For many people, including me, a diploma represents a person's integrity and people like you demean that immensely.

[Anonymous]

They do have two people who are mental health counselors that work as subcontractors at the school and both of them are excellent resources.

Melinda

[dack]

Our daughter spent 4 months at Hyde during the Fall of 2004. We pulled her out after Christmas and sent her back to her old school. Hyde was helpful in forwarding her transcripts to her school. Her old school did give her credit for her classes at Hyde. So we had no problem in that end. Hyde also did not give us a hard time about pulling her out. Of course we did not get our tuition back.

There were several areas which concerned us with respect to Hyde. The quality of education is lacking but that was not the reason we sent our daughter there in the first place. We sent her to Hyde for her behavioral issues as many parents do. We hoped that they could help her. What I did find was that Hyde is not a therapeutic school. But they try to act like one. They ask families to bare their souls and disclose at times, painful stories in FLC's. The students are constantly in groups dealing with issues. But they don't have the counselors to deal with this in a healthy, safe manner. Using unqualied, young, inexperienced facilitators, I feel, is dangerous.  I was very concerned about the age and experience of the staff. I think that many of the staff have their own issues and did not interact with my daughter in a positive,constructive, healthy manner. I do agree that Hyde is run like a cult. My daughter felt like she could trust no one.

I am happy to say that the time at Hyde straghtened my daughter out, but it was not because of Hyde's positive influence. My daughter knew that if she didn't get it together she was going to a therapeutic boarding school and would be gone for many more months. I think that I wanted to send her to Hyde because I wasn't ready to take the "therapeutic boarding school" route at the time. I thought that Hyde could be a satisfactory alternative. It is not. I would not recommend Hyde to prospective parents and students. I don't think it offers a healthy program to help teens in crisis.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-31 14:42:00, dack wrote:

"Our daughter spent 4 months at Hyde during the Fall of 2004. We pulled her out after Christmas and sent her back to her old school. Hyde was helpful in forwarding her transcripts to her school. Her old school did give her credit for her classes at Hyde. So we had no problem in that end. Hyde also did not give us a hard time about pulling her out. Of course we did not get our tuition back.



There were several areas which concerned us with respect to Hyde. The quality of education is lacking but that was not the reason we sent our daughter there in the first place. We sent her to Hyde for her behavioral issues as many parents do. We hoped that they could help her. What I did find was that Hyde is not a therapeutic school. But they try to act like one. They ask families to bare their souls and disclose at times, painful stories in FLC's. The students are constantly in groups dealing with issues. But they don't have the counselors to deal with this in a healthy, safe manner. Using unqualied, young, inexperienced facilitators, I feel, is dangerous.  I was very concerned about the age and experience of the staff. I think that many of the staff have their own issues and did not interact with my daughter in a positive,constructive, healthy manner. I do agree that Hyde is run like a cult. My daughter felt like she could trust no one.



I am happy to say that the time at Hyde straghtened my daughter out, but it was not because of Hyde's positive influence. My daughter knew that if she didn't get it together she was going to a therapeutic boarding school and would be gone for many more months. I think that I wanted to send her to Hyde because I wasn't ready to take the "therapeutic boarding school" route at the time. I thought that Hyde could be a satisfactory alternative. It is not. I would not recommend Hyde to prospective parents and students. I don't think it offers a healthy program to help teens in crisis."

Thanks for telling your story.  We too had to pull our daughter out of Hyde.  Our reasons were almost idential to yours.  We were shocked to discover how so many young and inexperienced staff were at Hyde handling so many complicated issues.  And you're right about the FLCs.  We were amazed to see how these groups were run like therapy groups and that they were run by Hyde staff who had so many of their own issues and no mental health training or degree.  I know that some people find Hyde useful.  But there are so many who run in the other direction once they realize what Hyde is all about.  

I'm very glad your daughter got back on her feet.  It's too bad it cost you so much financially and emotionally.  Many of us have learned about the serious problems at the Hyde School in a similarly painful way.  I agree with you that parents should try to find other schools that are healthier.  Although Hyde may help some, it's definitely not worth the risk.  Just look at the school's track record.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-29 21:19:00, tlocklear wrote:

">> Thanks for your posts Theresa. I am interested in knowing what you have been doing since graduating from Hyde. What is your career and what area of the country do you live?



Hello,

Thanks for your interest. After graduation in 1987, I went to Earlham College, which is a Quaker school in Indiana. I graduated in 1991 with a BA in Philosophy of Religion and then joined the Teach for America program. I was placed in North Carolina, where I taught high school Science and Math at a rural public school. I met my husband (playing sports!) in NC and had my son, Grady. While Grady was small I taught myself computer programming, then moved back to New York and took a job as a software developer. In my move to NY, I also left my husband, and spent 6 years as a single mom in the city. Two years ago, my husband and I reconciled and Grady and I moved to Washington, DC to be with him. I am still doing software development here, but I recently took the official title of Technical Business Analyst.



Hope that helps. Again, please feel free to contact me with any questions about my experience at Hyde.



Best,

Theresa

"

Theresa, You seem like a thoughtful, fair-minded person.  I respect your views about Hyde.  The problem I have is that what you have to say about Hyde is so different from what many other people report.  Are you concerned about all that you read on this website?  Are you concerned about the horror stories that many have told about how their kids went to Hyde with serious mental health issues but the school didn't have any professionals to deal with that?  Are you concerned about the very high turnover among Hyde teachers?  The fact that so many FLCs are run like therapy groups but the staff don't have any training to deal with those issues?  That so many people are describing how abusive Joe Gauld has been to them?  That so many students who start at Hyde leave before graduation?

You seem to be one of Hyde's success stories. I applaud you. The strong impression I'm getting, however, is that for every success story like yours there are many sad stories with bad endings.  That's not the way it should be.  

Many other schools for teens who are having difficulty don't have the terrible reputation Hyde has (although some do).  Why is that?

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-31 14:42:00, Anonymous wrote:

"They do have two people who are mental health counselors that work as subcontractors at the school and both of them are excellent resources.



Melinda"

When did the school hire mental health counselors?  When did that start?  Why did Hyde decide to do this?

[tlocklear]

Theresa, You seem like a thoughtful, fair-minded person.  I respect your views about Hyde.  The problem I have is that what you have to say about Hyde is so different from what many other people report.  Are you concerned about all that you read on this website?  Are you concerned about the horror stories that many have told about how their kids went to Hyde with serious mental health issues but the school didn't have any professionals to deal with that?  Are you concerned about the very high turnover among Hyde teachers?  The fact that so many FLCs are run like therapy groups but the staff don't have any training to deal with those issues?  That so many people are describing how abusive Joe Gauld has been to them?  That so many students who start at Hyde leave before graduation?



You seem to be one of Hyde's success stories. I applaud you. The strong impression I'm getting, however, is that for every success story like yours there are many sad stories with bad endings.  That's not the way it should be.  



Many other schools for teens who are having difficulty don't have the terrible reputation Hyde has (although some do).  Why is that?"

Hi,
Thank you for you thoughtful and inviting response.

I wish I could be more help to you. I can really only speak from my own experience, and what I might do in your situation. What I can recommend is to view each problem in it's own light and address it, rather than grouping them all together, so they seem overwhelming. For example, if there is a particular issue with a particular student who is not getting the services that you think he or she needs, then I would deal with that. If there is a particular incidient where Joe was abusive to you, then I suggest addressing that particular incident with him or someone with whom you feel comfortable at the school.

With regards to teacher attrition, having been a high school teacher for only two years myself, I have first hand experience with being "burnt out." And I didn't have to coach, and be a dorm parent, and lead wilderness trips, and eat every meal with students, and lead counseling groups, and attend FLCs, and... deal with kids that may or may not have mental health issues. This is a tall order for an individual, and I applaud them for holding out the entire year, if they aren't cut out for that.

About FLCs... I can tell you that my father was a psychiatrist, and he embraced the program. FLCs are intense and provoke a lot of emotional issues for students and parents. Sometimes more than they expect. FLCs are tough, no question. But they really can be quite rewarding and moving.
If kids, and parents for that matter, can go through this reflection process with an open mind, or even just begin to be open to observations and feedback, then Hyde will most likely work out for them. If not, they might leave. I believe there may be some statistics on students who leave, and actually return later in life, telling their stories of self-discovery. In fact, someone from my alumni list posted a remarkable story about a student from our year that didn't make it through Hyde as a teen:
http://hyde.edu/galleries/default-file/ ... er2004.pdf (pages 9-10)

It's a tough program. It may not be for everyone. I married a guy who I think would have had a pretty tough time there. He deals with emotional stuff on a very private level, and opening up at all, let alone in front of a group would have been a stretch for him. And his folks? Forget it.. "ain't no way..." to quote my mother-in-law. :smile:
But I think he would admit that it was through a similar process to what Hyde offers that eventually brought us back together, after six years of divorce.

If there are further steps that I can help you take toward addressing some of your concerns, feel free to contact me: theresa.locklear@gmail.com

Best,
Theresa Locklear

[Anonymous]

Theresa made a good point regardingthe occupation of her Father.  I can tell you that there is a huge number of children who have parents who are psychiatrists, Psychologists or Ed. Consultants.  If professional help didn't work at home, why the hell should Hyde hire them!

[Anonymous]

I miss Hyde.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your family can take care of everything on their own.  

Many people do need help.  Hyde is an option for help.  Many families/people benifit from help.  Too many times keeping family "secrets" did not help people.  For many -  when you see what others can do and how they are changing and working - it can help.  Many women talk with other women and learn how they are working on something so that they can learn from others.  

As for the sports.  I never was the MVP, but I learned sooo much from participating.  High School is a few short years.  Being challenged on a variety of levels is good for many.  

It is too bad that it didn't work for you.  It worked for me and many others.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-02-03 19:39:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Maybe your family can take care of everything on their own.  



Many people do need help.  Hyde is an option for help.  Many families/people benifit from help.  Too many times keeping family "secrets" did not help people.  For many -  when you see what others can do and how they are changing and working - it can help.  Many women talk with other women and learn how they are working on something so that they can learn from others.  



As for the sports.  I never was the MVP, but I learned sooo much from participating.  High School is a few short years.  Being challenged on a variety of levels is good for many.  



It is too bad that it didn't work for you.  It worked for me and many others."

As you can see, some people value their Hyde experience.  Others don't.  Hyde has had lots of problems, in addition to its "successes."  There are many families who have had painful, horrible Hyde experiences.  Any parent who is thinking about sending their child to Hyde needs to look at all of this information.  I think parents should be extremely concerned about Hyde's very unusual and high attrition rate, the large number of very unhappy families and students, the unusually high turnover among its faculty, and the unprofessionalism at the school, particularly for students who need mental health services.  I'd factor all of that information in with the positive stories about Hyde.  For me, there's no way I'd take the chance of sending my child to Hyde, especially since there are many good alternatives.

[Anonymous]

You may contact me at psmithcant@aol.com

[mansion dweller]

some of that is not completly true, when you visit the school  it is not presented in an honest way, they get choice "on-track" students to be tour giudes and they are told what they can and cannot say, my friend was told that she couldnt give tours anymore because she was being too honest,  other times when i have visited schools they always have an option to  sit in on class, on my interview i asked if thats wht i would be doing and i was suprised to find out that all there is is an interview and a tour,    when i attended it made more sense, if perspectivce studentswere to sit in class they would see how things really work which is often times teachers don't even come to class, most students are unprepared or have other things going on in class that take precedence such as, appointments, 2-4, sports games, academics are a low priority and it would be apparent from sitting in on classes